back to black

     There is no such thing as personal space in my house anymore. I sincerely think my family has lost their minds, every single one of them. The reason? 10 days, i'm not even kidding. My imminent departure is having different effects on my family and they're taking it out on me. They've lost their damn minds. Their mindset is that i'm CHOOSING to leave, nevermind that not attending college was never an option. And i thought that waiting to graduate was torture. This little idea has latched inside my mom's brain, like inception, and has take hold. Whenever I try to leave, she says: but you're leaving so soon. you'll see these people everyday and you only have a few days left with me, stay home. It's driving me up the wall, i'm going insane…for real this time. Our  family beach trip was a success, i really enjoyed soaking up the sun and took advantage of everyone being in a good mood to add to my sweater collection. Love brooks brothers..but now i'm back home and i'm stress eating. Literally inhaling handful of my strawberry mini wheats as i set aside what clothes i'm taking…the amount is nauseating. i'm listening to amy winehouse right now while i'm deciding which tshirts to take…the amount of trinity shirts i have is just sad. I really liked amy winehouse…she was a misunderstood talent. I just went off on a huge tangent but back to my soliloquy.


     My family is forcing me to spend quality time with them. This is time i should be spending out of the house, with people I want to see, having fun before i'm thrust into rush where i'll stress the whole time. There are days where my parents do the whole push me away because i'm leaving, those are good days. The bad days are when they want my presence around with a bone-crushing intensity that is quite like suffocation. Hellloo?? my house resembles casey anthony's mind right now…psychotic and soul sucking. Somebody help me puhlease…i get so bored in this house that i sneak out to go for a run. yes, the only way they let me out yesterday was for exercise…It's bad when you're watching shawshank redemption and you think: huh, reminds me of home. If morgan freeman could do the voiceover for my life, that would be just grand. his voice is magic. There's this movie i want to see at the capri tonight that ends TONIGHT.  its called 13 assassins. it's in japanese with english subtitles and includes a 40 minute action sequence. i gotta go see it with my bro, camille, who has been incognito for a month. i've missed her and we don't have much time left! Sorry if my life seems pathetic right now…it kinda is. montgomery is so boring and soul sucking that it puts a dementor to shame…that's bad. But, 10 more days and i'm out. i'll try and keep up my blog in Auburn but no promises. Hopefully i'll be too busy having crazy fun to write…ha ha ha
You went back to what you knew 
So far removed from all that we went through 
And I tread a troubled track 
My odds are stacked 
I'll go back to black 

We only said good-bye with words 
I died a hundred times 
You go back to her 
And I go back to..... 

I go back to us 
amy winehouse
and scene.